What Ella Left Behind
by Eveilae
Summary: Chapter 1 is about Ella' daughter, Chatper two is about ELla' daughter's daughter and so on. PG-13 for drug talk and prolly later violence.
1. Default Chapter

**The Perfect Story of Princess Tapeworm**  
  
Ella sat in a chair, smiling. She was as happy as she could get. There was something growing inside her. Not tapeworm. Not anymore.  
  
It was a baby. And it didn't LOOK like a tapeworm either. Hopefully. Not with Char's gene's anyway. But maybe Char's grandfather looked like a tapeworm.  
  
Anyway, it was FINALLY obvious she was going to have a baby. She hadn't had her period in three months. But if only she could have gotten those little things that tell you whether or not you're pregnant. It would have been so much easier. Might have even gotten her out of sewing. And dancing. And greeting.  
  
And the sex. Not that it was BAD. It was just boring. Anyway, she was going to have a baby. FINALLY! This was the whole point anyway. Hopefully it was a girl. That would show those stupid pompous men that girls could rule the whole kingdom too. MUHAHA!  
  
Now, what about names? Tapeworm? If the kid looked like most little kids when they're babies, then it sure would LOOK like a tapeworm. But how would Princess Tapeworm sound? Not very princessy. PERFECT!  
  
Char suddenly came in. 'Ah ha!' Ella thought, 'Perfect timing!'  
  
"CHAR! You know for the baby? I have the perfect name!" She closed her eyes to be dramatic. "Princess Tapeworm!"  
  
Char was totally. Ella opened one eye to glance out to see how excited he was. How surprised she was when she saw he was staring at her in horror.  
  
"What's wrong Char?" she asked.  
  
"There's a bug on the wall!" he cried and covered his head.  
  
Ella screamed and ran out of the room. After she called the medieval police and they got rid of the bug, she dragged Char into the room and started over. "Char! You know for the baby? I have the perfect name!" She closed her eyes to be dramatic. "Princess Tapeworm!"  
  
"Wowzerz!" he gasped. "That is beautiful!" he began to sob and the royal handkerchief maidens had to come and bring him a towel.  
  
Ella cackled evilly for a second and everyone turned to start at her strangely. "What?" she asked innocently. "I didn't cackle evilly for a second, so why are you staring?"  
  
Everyone rolled their eyes and walked away, except for Char, who was still crying.  
  
"Char, you can stop crying."  
  
Char looked up. "Oh. Well, it was about time!"  
  
"Yea. Let's go to the royal faerie station and order some fairies for the huge thing that I forgot the name of. You know, when the girl gets a spouse, and at first refuses to marry the guy, but then without knowing it's the same guy, falls in love with him anyway. OUR daughter isn't going to live a life like that, but we still need the fairies."  
  
"Ok!" So Char and Ella walk out of the perfect room, perfect hand in perfect hand, and they each sigh a perfect sigh for a perfect to be perfect baby.  
  
After Ella has the baby, she dies. Poor Princess Tapeworm! Since she was born perfect, she must be like every other perfect person in such stories, so Ella had to die. But later people began to say that Ella was alive, but they were all crazy Bahamas people, so no one believed them.  
  
Anyway, after Princess Tapeworm's not so perfect, yet perfect for this story delivery, Char cries a little and then take her to that ceremony that Ella never found out the name of. Princess Tapeworm was unknowingly given to some other perfect baby to be married as soon as they could. Well, as soon as their perfect parents could, anyway.  
  
So as Princess Tapeworm grew she was a perfect prefect purple princess. Except for the fact she was not purple. But Princess Tapeworm had ONE fault. GASP! She was allergic-it hurts to say this about such a perfect person as Princess Tapeworm, but she was-gasp- allergic to.. TAPEWORMS!  
  
SO it's a good thing that she didn't like with her perfect mother's imperfect stepmother and her perfect mother's imperfect stepsisters. They loved to have swimming pools full of tapeworms because they said it was good luck to have one growing inside of you. Somehow.  
  
So Princess Tapeworm was very happy in the perfect castle, being the perfect daughter..UNTIL!  
  
Until one day she found out that she was going to be married to Prince Bob. He was perfect too, except for the fact that had an allergy to sponges. They were a perfect couple, but Princess Tapeworm, being a perfect defender of freedom, didn't want to be a perfect wife for the perfect prince, who would probably also be the perfect husband and the perfect king. So she ran away and somehow survived without ruining her perfect shoes and her perfect dress and her perfect hair.  
  
There she met a man. He said his name was Bob. "Woa!" she gasped. "That's the name of the perfect man I'm supposed to perfectly marry! My name's Tapeworm!"  
  
"WHOA! That is soooo denied. The perfect girl I'm supposed to marry is called Tapeworm! Whoa, that is so cool!"  
  
"Wow! Since you are obviously perfect enough for me to fall in love with you, I'm going to kiss you."  
  
"Ok, and you obvious perfect enough to be a perfect replacement for the perfect Princess Tapeworm. So you can give me the perfect kiss, but it has to be perfect!"  
  
So Princess Tapeworm perfectly kisses the perfect Bob. Then they break away and do a voodoo dance. "UuuuHhhhhHhhKuuuh!"  
  
Attracted by the perfect noise of the perfect couple, a fairy that was at the ceremony thing that Ella never found the name of saw them dancing. SO she was flying perfectly straight to the castle of the very evil Lockturn.  
  
After telling the very evil Lockturn of the location of the perfect couple doing to the perfect voodoo dance, the very evil Lockturn cackles very evilly. "What do you want to be repaid with, my very evil helper?"  
  
The fairy, whose name was Kooa laughed. "My drug dealer stopped giving me drugs after he found out I was a fairy. Give me your druggie bag!"  
  
The very evil Lockturn looks around nervously. "Druggie bag.Uh, I, uh, don't know what you are talking about very evilly.he..he.."  
  
Kooa lunges very evilly at the very evil Lockturn. She grabs the bag from the very evil grip of the very evil Lockturn. Then next few days the very evil Lockturn came down hard. But then he found some very evil drugs. THEN he went on his very evil way to get the perfect couple.  
  
When he very evilly found them, they were still dancing and singing very perfectly. So the very evil Lockturn packed them very evilly onto a very evil donkey's back and rode on his evil way back to the very evil castle of the very evil Lockturn.  
  
The perfect couple shivered perfectly and pleaded perfectly with the very evil Lockturn. But the very evil Lockturn very evilly turned down everything they perfectly said.  
  
As soon as the very evil Lockturn got to his very evil castle, he pushed the perfect couple very evilly into a very evil dungeon and locked himself into his very evil room. The perfect couple cried perfectly. The very evil Lockturn stuck a very evil needle into his very evil arm and very evilly OD'ed. So the perfect couple were stuck perfectly into the very evil dungeon of the former very evil Lockturn. But the magical mice heard that the perfect couple were in perfect trouble so they made a magical plan to help the perfect couple get out of the very evil dungeon of the former very evil Lockturn.  
  
Finally the magical mice had a magical plan. They used a magical magic spell on the very evil door of the very evil dungeon of the former very evil Lockturn. Finally the very evil door of the very evil dungeon of the former very evil Lockturn opened very evilly. The perfect couple stepped out and thanked the magical mice perfectly.  
  
The perfect couple ran out of the very evil castle of the former very evil Lockturn with meeting a single very evil helper of the former very evil Lockturn. Soon they found some perfect horses by a stream and jumped on the perfect horses. Princess Tapeworm knew how to ride perfectly of coarse!  
  
Finally the perfect couple reached the perfect Princess Tapeworm's perfect kingdom [it was closer]. Then the perfect couple were perfectly told that they had always been made for each other, perfectly.  
  
SO the perfect couple had a perfect wedding and lived perfectly forever and ever until people from the future were tired of the perfect couple. 


	2. Default Chapter Numero Dos

Perfect Princess Tapeworm was swimming in the perfect royal swimming pool when Jon Bon Jovi stepped up to the perfect pool. "Hey! Want me to sing you a song?"  
  
Perfect Princess Tapeworm looks up at him perfectly and nods a perfect nod. "Okay. But it has to be perfect."  
  
Jon Bon Jovi began to sing. "It's myyyyyyyyyyy life-"  
  
Princess Tapeworm frowns, oh so very perfectly. "Ewwwwww! That sucked. Go away!"  
  
Jon Bon Jovi flops away, sad. He starts to sob and falls to his knees. "GOD! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO MEEEE! I'M FRIGGIN FAMOUS!"  
  
Then Breaking Benjamin passes by and since Jon Bon Jovi's scared of the lead singer, he sulks away. Breaking Benjamin comes over and asks to sing.  
  
"Ok, you can't be worse than that dude, anyway." Princess Tape worm answers perfectly.  
  
"My polyamorous friiiiiiiend got me in a mess of trouble agaaaaaain, so just when you think that you're all right-"  
  
"Ok, you are friggin awesome! You are going to play at my son's...uh...birthing? Ok, whatever it's called. And I'm gonna name him Benjamin after you."  
  
"What if it's a girl?" one of the guys asks.  
  
"Then I'll call her Benjamina."  
  
"COOL!"  
Then, when the girl was born, Princess Tapeworm [really QUEEN Tapeworm but that sounds stupid.] started to dance to the music of the theme song of Buffy perfectly [like a girl who writes stories about girls called Tapeworm does every so often]. Everyone joins in so that they don't seem weird.  
  
Breaking Benjamin begins to play because they are getting a little scared of Princess Tapeworm dancing, even if it is perfect dancing. Benjamina starts to cry.  
  
When Breaking Benjamin gets to the 'My ployamorous friiiiend' she begins to laugh. So Princess Tapeworm changes her name to Polyamorous. So she was there forwards called Princess Polyamorous.  
  
Then one day PP [as I will call her] meets Paula Cole and begins her singing career. Paula Cole makes her sing her songs and then she gets tired of the songs and smacks her silly.  
  
So then she goes and joins the long old Cranberries. "You are so preeeeeeetty the waaaaaay you aaaaaaaaaaare.."  
  
Then the Cranberries REALLY get old, and she quits and joins Xtina and Christina Aguleria the split personality singer. They make a new CD called Pitiful.  
  
PP helps Xtina and Chris to make the debut song. A preview was: "I am pitiful no matter what you say.." Etc.  
  
So then since more people can relate to Chris and Xtina calling themselves pitiful, millions of people buy the albums. There's even one man called Jason the X-master J who loves the song so much that he eats the CD for brunch. But that is another story and will be told at another time. So Xtina, Chris and PP get famous. One day PP come back home and her mother make her get drunk so they can marry her without her permission. When the media gets a hold of THAT they have a field day.  
  
The Media Council decided to destroy the castle of Princess Tapeworm piece by piece. They begin with the tabloids, then go big to newspapers and scrolls like the Scrolling Times and Castle Daily.  
  
So perfect Princess Tapeworm is sent to jail for child abuse and several other crimes that were mostly made up anyway. Perfect Ex-Princess Tapeworm screams that the very evil ghost of the very evil Lockturn made her do it but everyone knows that's a very evil lie.  
  
So PP goes back to the singing business, this time with Sum 41. She marries Deryck and they live happy. UNTIL....  
  
A drunken emu finds a very old spell book on the dusty ground and drunkenily reads from the very old spell book that was once on the dusty ground. The very old spell from the very old spell book that was once on the dusty ground that he reads brings people to life. He so happens to be drunkenily standing on the very evil grave of the very evil Lockturn.  
  
So then the very evil Lockturn cackled very evilly. Then a wise wizard appeared wisely from behind a tall tree. The wise wizard was tired, very wise of him I might add, of everything having adjectives in front of them. The tall tree read his wise mind and told him that the secret to defeating the Adjective Army was to have the famous PP make Wonder Wonderbread and to have the very evil Lockturn turn into a very evil emu.  
  
So the wise wizard joined heads with the tall tree and they came up with a wise, tall plan. The very evil Lockturn was still coming up from his very evil grave. When he finally came back, the wise wizard turned his into a very evil parrot. The very evil Lockturn cried very evilly and very angrily, "Hey! I just came back from the dead and now I'm a very evil parrot! No way! I hate you wise wizard!" Then the very evil Lockturn threw some dust at the wise wizard. But it turned out that I wasn't dust but drugs!  
  
So that was how the wise wizard got high. For three wise days and three wise days he was high and it took him another wise day and another wise hour to get over coming down [for wise wizards it's less]. Then the wise wizard spent ten wise days and ten wise nights trying to get the very evil Lockturn. Finally the wise wizard did and turned the very evil Lockturn into a very evil emu. The very evil emu [aka the ex-very evil Lockturn] peaked the wise wizard on the head very evilly and ran away, his very evil tail shaking.  
  
So now the wise wizard had to find PP. She was on tour with Sum 41. So the wise wizard found her at a concert.  
  
"Everybody;s got their problems/ Everyone says the same things to you!"  
  
"PP!!!!" the wise wizard cries wisely.  
  
"I feel I've come realize/ how fast life can be comprised/ step back to see what's going on/ I can't believe his happened to you/ this happened to you/ it's just a problem I'm faced with-"  
  
"PLEASE PP!!!" angry people began to stare angrily at the wise wizard. Why was he yelling piss?  
  
Finally PP came over after the song was over. "What do you WANT, wise wizard?!?!?!?!!"  
  
"I need you to bake wonderful Wonder Bread! You must save the kingdom!!!! And you have to come back to your husband, even it you don't like him."  
  
"NO WAY! I have my husband. Could my mom have married me to Gregory Smith or something? But NO, she had to marry to Kid Rock!!!!"  
  
"Kid Rock rocks!" yells a random person randomly.  
  
"Not when he's your husband and he's running a perfect kingdom very imperfectly."  
  
"True." Says the random person randomly.  
  
"So will you return to the perfect kingdom and save us all from internal torture from the Adjective Army?" asks the wise wizard wisely.  
  
"I think you mean ETERNAL!" corrects PP.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED.. 


	3. The Final Stupidity

We left off last time with PP and the wise wizard getting high- I mean, making a plan. They were just smoking pot accidentally. It's not their fault. It's the evil Lockturn's fault for throwing pot in the wise wizard's face and getting him addicted to drugs.  
  
Anyway, they had a plan. They would put some hash in the Wonderbread then it would be wonderful. SO they did.  
  
But they by mistake PP's cat, Cashcat, ate it all and PP got mad. So she smacked her silly. But there was a problem. There was no more hash! GASP!  
  
So PP came and made a clone of the wise wizard and the tall tree and chopped them up and made them into hash.  
  
Then she cackled evilly and choked on a pencil. But then a man with a time machine went back in time because since PP died because she choked, the world was forever tortured by the Adjective Army and the world was miserable, so he stopped her from choking and you can just skip this paragraph because it doesn't really matter so ha, I made you read so much for no good reason, and whoa this is a long sentence.  
  
PP decided that the cloned hash would taste better if it was grinded with some cherry flavored nail polish remover. So she dumped some of that in it, and forgot to read the label that said: "If you pour this into Wonderbread, then feed it to random people on the street, they will die a slow and painful death and you will go to jail with your mother."  
  
Good thing though that the very evil emu decided to get revenge on PP and eat all her Wonderbread. So he died a slow and painful death and PP got mad at him for eating her bread. She scolded him and sent him to his room. She didn't notice he was writhing on the floor, screaming.  
  
Not good.  
  
So PP. . .  
  
Then a huge explosion blew up the world.  
  
A giant all-powerful creature named Nadia decided that this story was getting too drug-like and decided to cancel it so all the little kiddies could forever watch Barney.  
  
And so ended the tale of Prince Polyamourous. Or so everyone thought. . .  
  
Maybe that's because it's true.  
  
Dun dun dun. . .  
  
The End. 


End file.
